I Got Served

Ever heard the saying “Dish it out but can’t take it”? Well I must admit that happened to me? It’s been ages since I posted anything on my blog and it’s because I GOT SERVED. Ha-ha. One of my greatest fears about starting a blog was to write something and people hate or criticize it. I know, I know welcome to the real world right? I’ve always had the “perfection complex” and for anyone who  doesn’t know what that is, it’s pretty much striving for flawlessness not necessarily for you but more so people won’t “talk” about you and I believe it stems from caring too much of what others think.  

Anyone that knows me knows I call things as I see it or as some people might put it “highly opinionated” and I do this without really thinking of how it might affect the other person. Anyway, once I started this blog I knew I was opening myself up to criticism but decided to do it anyway. I was rather reluctant to share the blog with people but when people read it all the feedback I got were great with no criticism and that didn’t sit right with me because I know I just started writing and I still have some things to learn.  Now don’t get me wrong, that feeling was awesome but I also needed some constructive criticism so I decided to go to the one person that I knew would hold no punches (one of the things I love about her by the way).

I summoned up the courage, texted my sister in law and asked her to critic my posting titled “New Year, New You” and her response was “Do you really want me to criticize it? Because I’m worried you may stop feeling love for a sister” when I read that, I knew what was coming and I braced myself for it. A few minutes later I received a text from her saying “I liked the first half much better, then we got to smart goal settings and I went really? Bola (this is the short form of my name for anyone that didn’t know) use the term SUCCINCT to the T. Make it short, sweet, dynamic and full of impact. It was too long and the words went to black to white and black again and I lost my train of thought” ……Ouch, it was so not what I wanted to hear and my feelings were hurt but I had asked her to be honest and she was. At that Instant I knew how it felt to be at the receiving end of someone’s keeping it real moment now don’t forget I had asked for her opinion and she wasn’t mean about it; it made me think of some of the times I criticized people when my opinion wasn’t asked for and my delivery wasn’t as nice.

 I’ve learned to be conscious with the way I criticize people as words hurt. It’s okay to be outspoken but let’s be mindful of the way we deliver those criticism. There’s a difference between constructive and mean criticisms and you never know when you’ll be the one getting served. Have you ever experienced a “You’ve got served moment”?  I would love to hear of your experience and how you felt. Please leave a comment